My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Randomize
