So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
