you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Randomize