Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
