i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
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