I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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