so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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