Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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