Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
time to smoke my breakfast
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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