Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
