I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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