Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Randomize
