right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
