I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize