We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
