the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize