We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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