Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
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