Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
We have started to decorate penises.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
