he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.