Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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