Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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