if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
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