i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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