He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
