It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Where is the hickey?
Buhtt sex?
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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