How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Randomize
