so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
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