maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
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