I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Randomize