Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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