Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
When are your genitals available?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize