I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Randomize
