i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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