I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
