No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
