I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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