What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize