You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
