What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
God, I missed his penis.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
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