My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
