I should be sponsored by Trojan
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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