I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
