wat bout pragnant strippers??
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
