Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
