Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
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Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
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He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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