I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
