his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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