I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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