Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize