im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize