Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
apparently the secret to your success is patron
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Randomize
